Quotes from Mad Dogs and Average Men
Will: Last night, at the restaurant, he tried to say "I love you" in sign language. The candle caught his sleeve on fire. I had to throw my margarita on him.
Jack: To put out the fire?
Will: No, because he said "I love you" in sign language.
Grace to Jack: Really, I'm not going to ask you again. Stay out of my underwear drawer. Nothing fits me anymore.
Karen: They have a lamb shank that Stan likes, although we could probably pour some cream sauce over a boot and he'd be happy.
Grace: If you're looking for your aunt Karen, she's not here. She doesn't work on days that end in... "day."
Karen: Uncle Stan wants to take you out and buy you a souvenier of Manhattan. How do you feel about twelve-story buildings?
Grace: This is great.
Will: You just ate that?
Grace: Yeah. How come you never make this for me?
Will: Because it's dog food.
Grace: Needs a little salt.
Jack: We still have plenty of time to figure something out before Paul gets here.
*knock knock*
Jack: Maybe it's not Paul.
Paul from outside the door: Will, it's Paul.
Jack: Maybe it's another Paul.
Paul from outside the door: Paul Putney.
Jack: Maybe he forgot about the dog
Paul from outside the door: I'm here to pick up the dog.
Jack: Maybe he's over you.
Paul from outside the door: I miss you.
Jack: Well, my work here is done.
Will: I love being a lawyer, I can convince myself of anything.
Karen: How did you know I was here?
Grace: Rosario. I waved a Hostess Berry Pie in front of her face and she sang like a bird.
Karen: That's it. Tomorrow she loses a finger.
Paul: Pepper gets me a lot of play. He's a hot dog.
Will: Enjoy your hot dog, because you'll be getting none of mine.
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