Quotes from Sex, Losers and Videotape

Will: Everybody from The Matrix called, they want their coat back.

Grace: For the record, I never liked him.
Will: You liked him.
Grace: I did, but he was no good for you.
Will: He was perfect for me.
Grace: He kinda was.
Will: Look, I'm fine. We had like, what, two dates? I've spent more time on hold trying to vote for American Idol.

Grace: Barry wasn't really that cute.
Will: He was totally cute.
Grace: He was, it's a major loss, stay strong.

Mr. Stein: Let's go have a drink.
Will: Sir, it's eight o'clock in the morning.
Mr. Stein: So, we'll have some eggs too.

Grace: Excuse me, I think I know how to turn a man on. I certainly didn't pass my driver's test by learning how to parallel park.

Jack: Though the eyes are the windows to your soul, the zipper is the window to your underwear.

Grace: Forget it. I'll just get Leo tapes from that season on Party of Five when Jennifer Love Hewitt's boobs grew sixteen inches over two episodes.

Will: What the hell, I'm alone, right? I might as well be fat and shiny. They ain't love handles if nobody loves you.

Will: Love is like a horse drawn carriage ride. It seems romantic at first, but eventually you realize you're cold and you're staring at an ass that craps right in front of you.