Quotes from Boardroom and a Parked Place


Will: I knew when we installed a pulsating shower-head it was gonna slow down our mornings.

Karen: That is one smooth-talkin' shower-head.
Grace: Will, it's happening again, I'm having that dream where she's everywhere.
Will: Well, it's more interesting than that one about the hot dog breaking up with the doughnut.

Grace: How does it...?
Karen: Money.

Will: Ah, Jack. Cute as a button. Not quite as smart.

Will: I love the opera. Getting dressed up, hanging out with fabulous people, drinking champage.... If it weren't for the damn music it'd be a perfect evening.

Grace: Hey, are you wearing smarty pants? 'Cause that's a pretty good plan.
Jack: Well, maybe not smarty pants, but perhaps a witty thong.

Grace: Oh my God, it's worse than I thought.
Jack: Yeah... Karen's a bottom.

Karen: Listen, I do not need your help. All right? I may be alone, broke, living in a car, and spooning a domestic, but Karen Walker has her dignity. Got it?!

Will: The seats were so comfortable, my ass couldn't stop talkin' about it the whole way home.

Karen: Jack! That had better be your penis.

Karen: Grace! That had better be your penis.
Grace: It's a thermos, but thank you.

Grace: The only reason to spend the night in a limo is if the drummer in your prom band dropped a quaalud in your Fresca.

Karen: Listen, uh, you gotta talk to that shower-head. He got a little fresh, I had to put him in his place. Well... my place.

Will: Mr. Stein, I have something difficult to say.
Mr. Stein: Is it, "Annie hit Frannie on the fanny with a flounder?"
Will: Yes. Yes, and thank you for saying it, now I don't have to.

Mr. Stein: Will, I want to thank you from the heart of my bottom... no, wait, strike that, reverse it.


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