Quotes from Heart Like a Wheelchair

Will: As much as I'd love to put on a trenchcoat and go looking for your grip on reality, I can't.

Will: I've got to wheel mother through the park this afternoon... and then later on I'll be scattering the ashes of my sex life in the Hudson.

Will: The greatest tragedy of my life was the day they yanked me from the breast of that saint.
Tom: If it's possible, you just got 10% cuter.

Jack: Lorraine's from England, so if you really want to hurt her, you could hold her down and make her watch the American version of anything British.

Tom: Have you been to Serendipity? Mother just loves how soft their entrees are.

Lyle: I cancelled Li-li for her. And Rita, but that's a whore of a different color.

Tom: I can't remember the last time I went to a restaurant after 5:30.
Will: So, do you really like me, or do you always cut up your date's meat?

Lyle: Karen, I've made a lot of mistakes in my life. I've let a lot of good women go, and a lot of bad women stay, and the ones in the middle I've been rather mean to. I'm not a boy anymore, and it's time for me to get relatively serious with someone that I kind of just met. So, you're not going to get rid of me easily, Karen. I'm going to stick to you like bangers to mash.
Karen: You're not getting your banger anywhere near my mash.

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