Quotes from Queens for a Day

Karen: When you pour your own glass of juice, you are taking a job away from someone who came to this country in a crate or an inner-tube.

Will: Vince said she's a tough cookie.
Grace: Aw, that doesn't sound so bad.
Will: Yeah, what he actually said was that she's already decided to hate me, and good luck.
Jack: Well, that doesn't sound so bad.

Karen: Imagine the most beautiful flower you've ever seen... its petals opening as it's gently touched by the sun.
Jack: Oh.
Karen: Now imagine a vagina next to that.
Grace: See, even that made me horny.

Will: In hindsight, maybe it wasn't a good idea to make her climb up on the display case and shake her groove thing, but, y'know, she was having fun up until the time she fell and her skirt hiked up and she showed her groove thing to the entire store.
Jack: Well, she sounds like a ball of fun. I can't wait to meet her tomorrow. She's a hooker, you say?

Vince: This is gonna be the first Thanksgiving we're not together as a family since we came over on the Mayflower. Mayflower Movers. Before Queens we lived in Bayonne.
Grace: Great, no sex and now no turkey.
Karen: Either way, no stuffing for you.

Jack: You missed all the drama at the parade today. Underdog got loose and mounted Bart Simpson.
Will: So, I guess, really his name should be Top Dog.

Vince: That's it, I can't take anymore, I have to confront him.
Will: Wait, wait, no, no, not tonight you're not.
Vince: I have to, I'm angry, and anger is the number one enemy of the hair follicle. I will not lose my hair for that man.

Karen: The old whore is rusty.

Jack: Thanksgiving celebrates the day the girl Indians first introduced the girl Pilgrims to sex. Yeah, they called it maize, because lesbian sex is very confusing and if you're not careful one can lose their way.

Will: I think it's great that she wants to come out. I'm sure that she has all the makings of a fine lesbian and she's gonna make a bunch of cats a fine mother some day.

Will: Thanksgiving is traditionally when gay men come out. Lesbians come out at Christmas. I think it has something to do with all the bulky sweaters.
Ro: Well, that does make sense. Plus, I like the whole message of Christmas, y'know, that woman can have a baby without a man.

Karen: That hunky spaghetti jockey chewed my ear like he was at an all-you-can-eat calamari bar.

Ro: Has anyone ever told you you're a very wise man?
Jack: No, they have not.

Karen: The old whore is back!